People,

I'm not sure how, but I have become the laziest human being ever to walk on the planet Earth.

Last night, while sitting in a pile of spent M&M wrappers and Diet Coke bottles, I decided to watch some TV. However, I was sitting all the way across the room from said TV. Now, instead of getting up and turning the TV on, I instead sat and thought about my predicament for a good five minutes all the while scanning the room for the remote. When I finally saw it I realized that it too was pretty far across the room. Dag.

Luckily a roommate in the kitchen happened to walk by the door to the common room and I suckered him into getting the remote for me. Ah....finally...TV. Of course, the remote was all screwed up and I could only get either the cable or the TV to turn on at one time. Again, instead of simply getting up, I spent a good ten minutes futilely trying to make the remote work.

Finally, I gave up on TV and picked up a magazine from the coffee table that I'd already read several times even though I have a bunch of new books in my room, 15 feet away. Dag.

In short, I wouldn't have lasted long in the 1800's.