Many folks, including the lovely and amazing Ladywife Sarah have been asking when the wedding summary is going up. The answer is on Monday.
There are a few reasons it is taking so long:
-I am lazy.
-People expect it be good, probably funny and poignant at the same time. That's a lot of pressure. It's a lot easier to write about being an asshole at Little League games.
-I will have to include pictures, which means I will have to learn more about computers and working with the internet. And learning, as we all know, is annoying. Stay away from that homework, kids.
-I will have to edit the whole overwhelming emotional experience into one digestible chunk, which is kind of like trying to push an entire block of Spam through the top of a Coke bottle. Point being, it's tough.
Anyway, despite these pressures I promise to drop the story in all its wonder on these pages on Monday. Get ready.
While I truly believe your wedding was indeed an "overwhelming emotional experience".. I find it hard to believe the only metaphor you could come up with was the forcing of a canned pork product through a soda bottle.
Personally, I would rather expound on the virtues of Senator Santorum (R. PA), also know as the devil incarnate, than listen to you blather about yer wedding.
Evindenciary Item #1 There is no such thing as a good wedding. People are mean and/or drunk at weddings(present company excluded of course). The whole extended family dealio just sucks big ass. too.
Evidenciary Item Numero Dos Marriage/Happiness/Solidarity equals death to rock and roll. So while I am happy for you as a person, as a fan of the rock I can't abide by it and something must be done.
Sincerely and with most affluent congratulatory caresses,
